The Merciless Alpha(erotica)

The fur brushing over my nose woke me up.

I opened my right eye, looking through the morning light to the big lug of a wolf taking up half of my bed. Leo’s wolf must have taken over last night and brought him up here. It wasn’t uncommon for a wolf to do something like this, curling up with a family or Pack member that is hurting. I scratched behind his ears, finding the spot that caused his leg to start thumping against the wall. “Who’s my good boy,” I teased as his paw hit the sidewall.

“Adrienne?”

“Good morning, Vicki.” She moved the curtain aside, and she shooed her mate off the bed and sent him to get dressed. “How are you this morning?”

I thought about it for a minute; the pain wasn’t as all-encompassing as last night, but it was still there. I felt like part of my soul had been ripped away, leaving the rest torn and bleeding. I checked my wolf in the back of my head, and she wasn’t any better off. She had curled into a ball, shivering, with her tail covering her eyes. I tried to call her forth, and nothing happened. “It hurts, and my wolf won’t come out,” I said.

“Come on down,” she said. I scooted to the edge, and she helped me down before pulling me into a hug. “Your wolf is hurting more than your human side is,” she said. “Your human side saw him for a few minutes. Your wolf started bonding with his wolf as soon as she smelled him.”

“She won’t respond to me,” I said.

“It could be weeks. After my mate died, I didn’t shift except when she decided to howl her grief to the moon. It took a month before we were working together again, and I could shift at will.”

“What about the pain?”

“You learn to live with it,” she said as we sat down at the table. “I wish I could tell you something else, but healing takes time.”

I thought about the stories I’d heard from the widowed, but the people who knew best what I was going through were in the next trailer. Both Alpha Ivan and Luna Karen had their mates reject them. “I need to talk to my Father,” I said.

“He’s bringing Karen with him as soon as they get dressed,” she said. “Leo already asked him. We figured you would have questions.”

I had more than a few. “If I feel this bad, what does Timothy feel like?”

Just then, there was a knock on the door. I lept into my father’s arms as Karen hugged me from behind. “My little girl,” Ivan said as their wolves comforted mine. “I won’t ask if you are all right, because I know you aren’t. I’ll be here for you, though.”

***********

We sat back down as Leo came out and grabbed the coffee cups. I asked my question. “What happens to us now that the rejection is complete?”

“There is no more ‘us’ between you and Timothy,” Karen said. “The rejection severed the link the Moon Goddess placed between your souls. If you had walked away from each other, perhaps in time, you might find a way to heal it. That option isn’t there anymore.”

“Because he mated with Traci,” I said.

Karen nodded. “Yes. When you mate another, the link is permanently severed. Even if Traci died now, your wolf wouldn’t feel any pull to Timothy. As far as your wolf is concerned, he’s dead.”

It felt like that. “I was barely able to walk out of there, how did Timothy ever mark that bitch?”

“It wasn’t his wolf. I figure his wolf was ready to mark you and didn’t react fast enough in his pain when his human side decided to mark Traci instead.” She shook her head.

“Is he hurting like I am?”Nôvel/Dr(a)ma.Org - Content owner.

“I don’t think so, not now that he has a mating bond. His wolf must be furious with him, though. There’s a long list of people that are furious with him right now, and that’s why he’s already on a plane home,” Ivan said.

“What happens to her mate now that she has chosen another male?” I didn’t feel sorry for the bitch, but some guy just dodged a bullet.

“There’s no way to know. Now that she is mated, there is no bond for his wolf to sense. If they met today, she’d just be another mated wolf to him. Our best guess is that he looks and looks and never finds her.”

“I’d feel sorry for him, except he managed to avoid getting tied to that toxic bitch,” I said. “My mate is gone, so I won’t feel anything either.”

“At some point, we think the Goddess grants you another mate. You can wait until you feel the pull again, or maybe you fall in love and mate that person.”

I shook my head, no. “I can’t do that,” I said. “I won’t be the wolf who takes another’s mate from her.”

Karen put her hands over mine. “I know that, Vicki. You need to heal, and after you heal, be open to whatever Luna has for you.”

I nodded, my hand moving to my chest where it felt like the big, empty space resided. “I need to finish school, and there is college,” I said. “It’s not so bad. I was afraid of leaving here with a mate, and now I’m not.” I tried to put on a brave face, but Leo knew me better. He pulled me into his lap, letting me rest against his chest as I gathered myself again.

His hand ran up and down my back, calming me. “You can’t be alone now, Vicki. You still are a Mantled Alpha, but your wolf has withdrawn, and that makes you vulnerable.”

I looked up at him, a little shocked. We’d built up my self-defense skills so I could defend my neck. Without my wolf, I was as weak as any human. I hated the idea of a minder, but he was right. “I understand,” I said softly. “Maybe I should fly home early and let the Pack protect me instead.”

“No,” Leo said. “I think it would be better if you stayed here where we can help you. Most of the leaders here were shocked at what happened to you. The ladies from the party will have your back, I just want to make sure you don’t leave them behind. There’s also the dive trip I booked and paid for last night.” My eyes got wide and looked at him. “My brother and I have to be around for the meetings, or I’d go.”

“Lunas can get away with skipping the meetings, so Karen and I are going,” Adrienne said. “When the other females found out what you wanted to do today, we got dozens of people who wanted to be with you. We had so many volunteers that we changed the non-mated activities today to a beach day.”

“The charter can handle up to ten divers, and the rest are going to set up a party on the beach. I’m a little concerned about the amount of food and drink they are taking away from here,” Leo laughed.

“I’m sure you’ll be all right. We both know who eats more,” I said as I stood up. I tried to link my best friend, and her wall was still up. “What’s going on with Amy? Did you send her to stay somewhere else?” All of the sudden, no one wanted to look at me. Leo looked at Adrienne for help. “What?”

“We’ll let her tell you at breakfast,” Adrienne said. “It’s not our place. Oh, my! Look at the time. We should be getting to breakfast before they run out of bacon!”

John and Karen got up and asked me to talk to them if they had any questions. “We’ll walk with you after you change,” Leo said before he followed them outside. I quickly changed into a pair of jean shorts, a loose top, and sandals, then went out to join them.

It was not a comfortable walk.

It wasn’t that people avoided me; it was how they reacted when they saw me. The wide-eyed recognition, followed by the look of pity, then the uncomfortable silence as they tried to figure out what to say or do around me. It was like I was a broken toy they thought might explode at any moment. Leo and Adrienne held my hands as I walked between them, covering the few blocks between our trailer and the main house.

When we walked into the dining hall for breakfast, all conversation stopped, and everyone was staring at me. I’d accepted what my Alphas had told me; none of this was MY fault, and I had done nothing I should apologize over. “Good morning, everyone,” I said loudly and with a smile. “Did you leave me any bacon?”

There were a few laughs, and people started eating and talking again as we went to the buffet line. One thing Mom and I had learned about werewolves is that we are creatures of contact; we express sympathy, solidarity, and comfort with our touch more than words. Almost everyone we came close to gave me a handshake, a pat on the arm or shoulder, or a hug. All this made it take a while to get through the line. I had my tray with my pancakes, scrambled eggs and cheese, orange juice, and a pile of bacon strips. “Where are we sitting?”

Leo pointed to the ‘old people’ area. “Adrienne and I have to sit with the other Alphas and Lunas, but Amy is over there in the corner. She saved you a spot.”

I followed his arm to look across the room and saw her waving at me.

She was at a table with two other couples.

She was sitting on the lap of an athletic-looking guy who had his arms around her waist.

And her fresh mating bite was displayed by the loose-neck shirt she was wearing.