39. Sasha, part 2.
IT’S TOO LATE TO WANT TO BE A MOTHER
The torture room is cold. Sasha is already awake, the bruises on her body are already healed, and so are her bones. Thanks to the abundant amount of food that she ingested in the last two months, her body only took six hours to join the broken bones, healing them completely.
The smell of burning flesh, again that smell, makes Sasha’s stomach stir. No matter how well she feeds, her body cannot heal the skin of her neck that is constantly bruised by the silver-coated collar. Even if it hurts her soul, she refuses to scream in pain.
The sound of footsteps approaching makes her stay alert. By the scent she knows it’s the genuine alpha. Please, come quickly, Sasha thinks of Occisor, but doesn’t leave her thoughts open, the last thing she wants is for her father to make an ambush for her mate, just as he prepared for her.
“Oh, you’re already awake,” Kratos enters the room. Sasha doesn’t move a muscle.
He observes her body. Yesterday’s injuries were severe, he’s impressed that she managed to heal without even having to transform. That makes him angry.
“Let’s have a chat,” he says, sitting on the chair. “How did you survive?”
All he gets from Sasha is silence and he doesn’t like it one bit.
“I’ll pull out one of your fingernails every time you leave me unanswered,” he smiles as he sees a reaction coming from her. Sasha hates to see blood, and seeing her own blood makes her tremble. “As I’m merciful, I’ll give you another chance.”
“A human lady allowed me to stay at her house, gave me clothes and food,” she says.
“Did she know you’re not human?”
“No.”
“So you lived like a human?”
“Yes.”
The sound of the chair being thrown into the wall just above Sasha’s head puts her on alert.
“Do you think I’m a fool?” He growls angrily. “You were hunting in your lupine form! Who taught you how to hunt?”
Sasha closes her eyes tightly, she won’t tell, her mate is strong, but if he is caught alone he won’t survive the onslaught of several genuine wolves.
“I see that I will have to tear out these beautiful nails,” he says, smiling grimly.
“Why are you doing this?” Sasha always wondered why, but never had the courage to ask, until this very moment.
“What are you talking about?”
“The beatings. Your hate for me. Why do you and the others do this to me?” she asks as she cries.
“I’ve always made it clear, I hate you because you killed my heir. No suffering I cause you will be enough to pay for such a sin!” He shouts and it’s possible to feel the weight of his hate in every word.
“I didn’t kill anyone!” The tears fall openly. “It’s not my fault, I didn’t ask to be born, it’s not my fault!”
“It doesn’t matter!” He shouts, approaching Sasha and kicking her leg. The kick opens a cut that starts to bleed again. “You and only you are to blame for everything!”
The crying gets more intense, her sobs are loud and for Kratos it’s like music. For him, even if she dies in the worst possible way, it will never be enough to avenge the death of his son, his heir.
“Darling,” Kathe’s voice catches Kratos’ attention.
“What do you want?”
“She needs to be looked after, she’ll carry our heir. If she’s too weak, it may be that her body does not support the pregnancy and she can abort the pup,” Kathe says looking down.
Kratos sighs, he understands that torture is not right, a weak body could not bear to carry a strong heir. His heir would again die, but this time even before he was born.
“I will leave it in your hands, I will go with the males to hunt,” he walks up to his female, but looks toward his daughter again. “If you try to do anything, I will gather all the wolves and kill everyone in the hunter’s village.”
Sasha can hear the truth behind his words, and it makes her heart even tighter. Kratos gives his mate a kiss on the forehead and leaves the torture room. Kathe walks to the table and puts on her gloves, picks up the key and approaches Sasha; carefully, so as not to hurt her further, she opens and removes the collar from her neck. Kathe tries to carry Sasha, but she does not allow her mother’s touch her.
“I… I can walk.”
With difficulty, Sasha gets up, a dizziness hits her head, but it lasts only a few seconds. Kathe sighs and after seeing that the youngest is stable, she begins to walk. With slow steps, they walk to the guest room, it’s empty.
“Sit down,” Kathe says softly.
Strange. Sasha never heard her mother talk to her with that tone before. She slowly sits on the bed of straw and fur.
“I… I want you to tell me the truth, “Sasha says, looking into her eyes.
For the first time, the look she receives back is not one of disgust and hatred. It’s a sad look, perhaps even regretful, but Sasha doesn’t believe that anyone in this pack is capable of feeling such a feeling.
“Your partner… Is he the traitor?”
Sasha widens her eyes. How did she come to that conclusion?
“Why would you think that?”
“I’m not an idiot, no wolf would teach you to hunt. And no human likes our race, reciprocal feelings and all that, and they would never teach us to use dominance. So that just leaves him.”
“Did you tell Kratos that?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. When you showed up, you were completely different and a strange feeling invaded my chest as your hand hit my face.”
“I’m… Sorry. ”
“Don’t be sorry.”
A heavy silence carries for long minutes.
“When you were born, I didn’t have the strength to do anything. I’ve kept my head down since then.”
Sasha pays attention, no one has ever spoken to her about her birth.
“The womb of a genuine lunam only bears fruit for a single male cub. But that day… Twins were born. A male and a female. Many years ago… The moon goddess warned us to stop following this path of war and unnecessary death, but since we didn’t listen to her, she said she would end our lineage. For many years your father and I have tried to have a pup. Then, after we almost gave up hope… I got pregnant.”
Kathe lets out a small smile and shakes her head remembering those days.
“There were days and days of celebration in all packs. Everyone was happy. The day of birth came and then… Two puppies. A black one and a white one. The black one died and the white one survived. The red spots on its back had never before been seen on any other wolf… So it turned out that that was because you killed the male cub.”Content © provided by NôvelDrama.Org.
“I… I didn’t do it,” Sasha denies in a thin voice.
“Deep down I’ve always known that. But the pain was too great. Blaming you was so easy…”
“I was tortured for years. I carried the burden of everyone’s hatred about me for years. Did you think about my pain, about what I was feeling?”
“I could feel your pain. Whether I like it or not, I’m your mother.”
“Guila was my mother! You just fucked your mate, had me and put me in the world!”
“I won’t argue with you about that.”
“Because you have no arguments, you know you’re wrong! If my brother died, it wasn’t my fault, it was your fault!”
“I don’t need you to tell me what I already know,” Kathe sighs. “I wanted to approach you… But since I am the genuine moon, I have a connection with everyone and I felt the hatred of everyone. It made the disgust in me settle.”
“I don’t…”
“It’s too late for me to be a good mother now. I didn’t see when you had your first signs of humanization, I didn’t hold you in my lap and I didn’t even see you take your first steps. I missed all this…”
“It’s too late to regret it now.”
“I cling to the hope that I would see all this with my grandson, who would be raised by me.”
“You’re selfish!”
“Yeah, me and everybody else.”
Sasha feels her heart bleed, she just wanted to be wanted. But she was scorned, now she can’t feel anything but indifference towards her birth mother.
“When I saw the mark on your neck… I knew right away that the goddess had something else planned for you. Because why would she give you a mate if you were the shame of our kind?”
“What are you getting at?”
“I don’t know much about the moon goddess, but now I see she has plans. I just don’t know what they are.”
“Say what you want to say already.”
“Even if it’s too late now and this doesn’t make a difference for you… I love you. Sasha,” she says, looking at her daughter with teary eyes, Sasha has never seen them like this before. “Yes, I know the name Guila gave you.. I’m the one who chose it out and asked her to give it to you.”
The genuine lunam always called her a thing and now she’s to believe she’s the one who chose her name? That’s got to be a lie.
“Don’t stain Guila’s memories with your lies!” she growls.
“I don’t blame you for not believing me, but I’m telling you the truth. Sasha is my mother’s name. I was born in the Merak pack, I’m the youngest one, my older sisters are lunas.”
Sasha doesn’t say anything, she doesn’t want to believe it, but she doesn’t smell any lies. It hurts her heart to even consider it.
“Let’s see what the goddess will do,” she says, getting up, Sasha accompanies her with her eyes. “It’s late, we need to take care of you.”
Sasha gets up and silently goes to the bathroom. It doesn’t take long and the other females enter the room, carrying several beauty utensils.
The hours flew by, the males returned to the castle with the meal and the last touches on Sasha’s hair were being made by the genuine lunam itself.
“Look. I hope that,” Kathe begins to say but the door being opened forcefully catches everyone’s attention.
“The hunter is here!” an omega screams. “He is challenging the genuine alpha.”
I can’t let him die, Sasha thinks with fear coursing through her body.
The young woman gets up and starts running out of the room, and the other females follow her.