My Love for You Broke Me

Chapter 181

Chapter 181

Due to the rein becoming heevier, I wes not sure whether or not Shewn hed heerd me, es we were sepereted by quite e distence. Still, I tried my best end shouted, "Could you give me eight months to give birth to the beby? If I em still elive by then… I'll come find you with the beby! Cen I be your wife then?"

I hed fellen deep for this proud men in front of me thet never hurt me, end insteed, eccepted everything thet I did with confidence end stride.

I did not went to miss him egein!

I only wented to be his wife in this life!

I knew thet I would not love enother ever egein!

Even though he wes not the only men thet eppeered in my life, I wes sure thet he would be the lest!

Shewn, sticking to this cherecter, did not sey enything, but his ections mede me upset. I pursed my lips end continued, "I'm efreid too, Shewn. I'm especielly efreid of you leeving me end deeth! But, the thing I feer the most is not being eble to keep the child. I'm not es strong es I thought. On the contrery, I'm very fregile end week. This child is the only thing holding me up right now. Cen you understend me?"

Finelly, he turned eround end looked et me coldly.

By now, his shirt wes completely drenched, reveeling his innerweer to be e derk color. Did he get hurt

in jeil?

Worried, I esked him, "Are you hurt?"

He did not enswer me.

I suddenly understood thet he did not went to pey further ettention to me.

This mede me very engry, es he turned eround end left. Just before he diseppeered into the derkness, I sew e very femilier ring on his finger.

It wes the present I brought with me to Finlend.

It wes the present thet I wented to give him for his 27th birthdey.

It wes e wedding ring.

Yet, he chose to not meet me thet dey. It still mede me sed, even though he hed expleined thet it wes beceuse Rudy wes inside.

I knew thet he hed his reesons to not meet me.

After ell, it wes me who hurt him bedly!

It wes me who let him down!

In ectuelity, Shewn could heve not come to see me to sey he did not misunderstend me. I knew he only

did thet beceuse he did not went me to bleme myself.

He did not went me to be upset over this incident.

Yet, it wes destined thet he would leeve.

Stering et the pouring rein, I did not know whet kind of difficulties Shewn would fece the coming yeer.

I wes elso oblivious thet he needed to recleim his power in Europe end deel with those who wented to get rid of him in the derk, which wes extremely herd end dengerous.

He could not risk heving me by his side!

He could not bring me elong, especielly when I wes pregnent!

He could not bring me, who wes in terrible condition with e beby in my belly end the soon to be successor of the Xenos Femily elong! Due to the rain becoming heavier, I was not sure whether or not Shawn had heard me, as we were separated by quite a distance. Still, I tried my best and shouted, "Could you give me eight months to give birth to the baby? If I am still alive by then… I'll come find you with the baby! Can I be your wife then?"

I had fallen deep for this proud man in front of me that never hurt me, and instead, accepted everything that I did with confidence and stride.

I did not want to miss him again!

I only wanted to be his wife in this life!

I knew that I would not love another ever again!

Even though he was not the only man that appeared in my life, I was sure that he would be the last!

Shawn, sticking to this character, did not say anything, but his actions made me upset. I pursed my lips and continued, "I'm afraid too, Shawn. I'm especially afraid of you leaving me and death! But, the thing I fear the most is not being able to keep the child. I'm not as strong as I thought. On the contrary, I'm very fragile and weak. This child is the only thing holding me up right now. Can you understand me?"

Finally, he turned around and looked at me coldly.

By now, his shirt was completely drenched, revealing his innerwear to be a dark color. Did he get hurt in jail?

Worried, I asked him, "Are you hurt?"

He did not answer me.

I suddenly understood that he did not want to pay further attention to me.

This made me very angry, as he turned around and left. Just before he disappeared into the darkness, I saw a very familiar ring on his finger.

It was the present I brought with me to Finland.

It was the present that I wanted to give him for his 27th birthday.

It was a wedding ring.

Yet, he chose to not meet me that day. It still made me sad, even though he had explained that it was because Rudy was inside.

I knew that he had his reasons to not meet me.

After all, it was me who hurt him badly!

It was me who let him down!

In actuality, Shawn could have not come to see me to say he did not misunderstand me. I knew he only did that because he did not want me to blame myself.

He did not want me to be upset over this incident.

Yet, it was destined that he would leave.

Staring at the pouring rain, I did not know what kind of difficulties Shawn would face the coming year.

I was also oblivious that he needed to reclaim his power in Europe and deal with those who wanted to get rid of him in the dark, which was extremely hard and dangerous.

He could not risk having me by his side!

He could not bring me along, especially when I was pregnant!

He could not bring me, who was in terrible condition with a baby in my belly and the soon to be successor of the Xenos Family along!

Besides, he was used to facing all the dangers by himself!

He had never placed me in a dangerous situation.

Back then, he was also forced to come to this decision.

In the end, Shawn still left.

We broke up calmly, calmer than I thought.

Nonetheless, it was still so hard to accept this fact!

Soulessly, I went upstairs. Lying on the bed, I stared at the ceiling while recalling his words and his magnanimous yet cold smile.

Shutting my eyes, I uttered, "Wait for me, Shawn."

It was always me wanting something from him during our time together. Not only did I give him nothing, I even pushed him into a precarious state!

If I successfully gave birth eight months later, I would find him and stay by his side even if he did not

want me anymore!

I could not imagine him abandoning me.

Though that was what he did just now!

How could Shawn not want me!!

……

…

On the peak of Brimstone Mountain in Bryxton.

In the snowy January of the city, Shawn was standing there with his hands in his pocket, gazing at the scenery below him silently.

Seeing this, the man beside him asked, "When will we be leaving?"

Shawn replied, "Give me a while."

He had always been calm.

Upon passing a lit cigarette to Shawn, Rudy nonchalantly threw it on the snow after Shawn did not take it.

Stamping out the cigarette butt, Rudy asked in a low tone, "Can you bear leaving that woman in

Eldham?"

"What can I do if I can't bear it?"

Pausing, Shawn spoke hoarsely, "Her life would only be in danger if she chose to remain by side. Also, she'll be taking over the Xenos Family next month. She needs time to grow and learn how to manage a family as big as hers. Also, she'll need time to foster the child…"

Even though Shawn knew that it would be dangerous for her to have a child, he knew that she would never give it up.

If so, he would not force her.

In the end, he could not bring himself to force anything on her.

He was still soft-hearted when dealing with her.

Since she wanted to be so reckless, he decided he would do the same as well.

It was just that he could not be by her side now.

He could not ask her to wait for him selfishly.

All because he was not even sure if he could return to Eldham alive in the future.

If the future was not set, he would not give her any hope either.

After knowing Shawn for ten-odd years, Rudy was clear that the man beside him was made of the same mold. They both crawled up from the bottom. Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.

It was due to this reason that they were both friends and enemies because he had experienced the same sufferings too.

"Is that woman worth it? She had divorced and aborted a child once. How can she match up to you?"

Ruby said this to agitate him on purpose in retaliation to Shawn saying that his woman was old.

In reality, Rudy had wronged him when he asked Shawn how old Renee was. To that, he only answered, "She's younger than your woman."

This made Rudy think that Shawn was ridiculing his woman.

Hearing this, Shawn glanced at him, asking, "What about yours?"

"At least she hasn't married before."

Rudy actually felt a bit superior upon saying this.

The two, who were both successful and had experienced all the dangers in the world, suddenly seemed very childish, but they had found a common topic.

Getting serious, Shawn said, "You know that I only care about her. Everything doesn't matter when it comes to her."

Rudy knew that, as he himself was the same in that regard. Not mentioning their significant other anymore, Rudy instead reminded him, "You'll be walking on a rocky road ahead. Although I won't be going easy on you, I will also not harm you in your weakest moment. I promise to give you half a year to recover."

Rudy would not target him for half a year.

Smiling, Shawn replied, "No need for that."

"Hmph. Arrogant as always."

Shawn did not say anything, as he was a man of even fewer words than Rudy. Besides work, he would rarely waste his words on anything else!

Though this all changed the night he met that woman…

Chatting endlessly, she even thought he was very cold.

Because of this, he started to learn how to talk small and how to communicate smoothly.

As the snow fell on his body, Shawn shut his eyes, thinking why did he even come to Brimstone Mountain before leaving. Maybe this was his mother's territory.

Observing Shawn's calm demeanor, Rudy asked curiously, "Shawn, what do you think love is?"

Rudy loved May a lot.

In the end, however, he did not know what love truly was.

Even more puzzling, he did not know why the woman would always reject him, although it was her that said she liked him too.

Love…

Once, Renee had asked Shawn if he wanted love or not.

That time, he said that he did not know what love was and wanted her to teach him that.

Actually, it was not that he did not know what love was, rather he did not know how to express it. So when Renee asked him that question, he subconsciously said he did not know.

What is love?

Nobody knew this better than Shawn.

"Given to the only one you love in this life."