MORE THAN A SECRETARY

“Jordan, I think I am going to lose my mind, I can’t take this anymore, I should have kept how I felt to myself, and just taken what he offered and we would have still been okay, I messed up,”

Katrina voiced as she sat heavily on the couch in Jordan’s living room, she just got back from the office and the energy between her and Lucas was really hard, she shouldn’t have said anything, she should have kept how she felt to herself like she has been doing, but keeping her feelings in have become so hard, she wanted more, all he had to say was he was going to try and make them work, now he doesn’t even talk to her much and he was giving her a chance to come in for work only four times a week, she hadn’t done much at work today and he talk with and went on meeting with the newly employed assistants, there were two of them, he made a clear statement that he didn’t want her close, which hurt, each time the office line rings and he ask for the others instead of her, she felt her heartbreak even more, the only time he had spoken to her was when it was related to an old project they had both worked on at his place, after that he didn’t even act like she existed in that office, and it had been going on for the whole week.

“And what? Settle for the barest minimal until he calls it quit himself?”

He asked, she didn’t know anymore, even after the long week off and also the days he hadn’t been around she has still not been able to get over him,

“What you said was the right thing girl, it’s been over two months, it’s time for you to move on, Lucas isn’t the only man in the world,”

“But he is the only man I want Jordan,”

“That’s because you haven’t let yourself see beyond him, why not try and see other men, trust me there are a million men out there better than Lucas, you are tied to him because you are not giving yourself a chance to see those other men, you are letting Lucas or may I say your feelings for him run your life and it’s becoming not good for you, you have lost much weight and barely smile, just let him go,”

He advised, and she wished it was that easy to call her feelings off but it wasn’t, she felt like a fool loving Lucas, she wished she could just turn it off already.

“He cut down on my working days, I only have to be at work for three days in a week and u get the weekend off too, and he increased my pay,”

She disclosed, he had sent her the email and she had sent it a big *I DON’T WANT IT* in response, he didn’t reply.

“That’s good, you get more time to yourself and also make more money, just forget about him and move on babe, that’s the best bet,”

He advised, he looked excited about the news but she didn’t feel the same, she felt like it was Lucas’s way of doing away with her which made it hurt.

“I think I have to quit, that’s the only way for me not to lose my mind, he doesn’t need me anyway,”

She let out, she has to, if not she might really lose her mind.

“Wow, calm down, do you have to, I mean think about it, I know you already get paid loads and he is adding to it? And you wanna leave? Girl, don’t do that,”

“I have to Jordan, it’s not about the money, it’s about my happiness, I don’t think I will ever be happy if I am around Lucas, knowing I can’t have him,”

She replied.

“Okay, I get you, I don’t have a say in this, it’s up to you, if that’s what you want,”

“I don’t know what I want Jordan, the only thing I am sure that I want I can’t get, I don’t know anything else, I am barely existing right now and I don’t even know if quitting will change that,”

“Let’s take it one step at a time, if you feel quitting is the first step then let’s do that, you deserve the best Katrina, you are a loving woman and if Lucas doesn’t see what he had and lost then it’s on him not you alright?”

“I don’t know, I feel like a failure Jordan,”

“You are not lady, now stop talking down on yourself,”

“I am going to quit,”

“Let’s do that,”

“And get my life back in order,”

“Of course,”

“And move on without Lucas,”

“His loss,”

“I don’t think I can do it Jord, I can’t, I am going to die alone, Lucas is the only man I love and will ever love,”

She let out covering her face with her hands, she was doomed.

“Now, you are pissing me off, cuz what the fuck am I then, or don’t you love me?”

“You know I do,”

She replied looking up at him, he wasn’t really pissed.

“And your dad too,”

“Of course, I love my dad,”

“See, Lucas is not the only man you love and if you let yourself you can fall in love with someone else and be happy, take me, for instance, I didn’t let Kelvin take away my happiness, and guess what?”

He said smiling mischievously.

“What did you do Jordan?”

“Nothing, it’s Kelvin,”

“Why what happened with him?”

“He called a couple of days ago saying he misses me and that he made a mistake, blablabla,”

“Wow, why are you just telling me this? We have literally been seeing each other a lot these days, you traitor,”

“How can I when you were wallowing in your shadows of heartbreak,”

“I am still heartbroken Jordan,”

“Yeah, anyway, I told him to go fuck himself, I even recorded it,”

He said bringing out his phone and playing the record, despite her sadness, Katrina couldn’t help but laugh at the words Jordan used on Kelvin, knowing how heartbroken Jordan felt when he dumped him, she didn’t feel any pity for him, she wished Lucas will end up regretting losing her but that’s never going to happen, Lucas was heartless and would never regret anything.

“This is crazy Jordan,”All text © NôvelD(r)a'ma.Org.

She said laughing, it felt good to laugh drowning in sadness for a while now, even when she visited her parents she had tried her best to be happy and has a great time but still she felt sad.

“I know right, I gave him a piece of my mind, I don’t think he will forget what I said anytime soon,”

“You are not nice Jord,”

“That’s how you should be too Kat, don’t let Lucas walk over you, give him a piece of your mind and walk out with your head up high,”

“You told me to get down with him and look at where that landed me, so why should I take your words?”

She asked eyeing him, he had been one of the reasons Lucas and her had the whole affair, telling her to seduce him and all.

“Wait a moment miss, I also remember telling you to prepare for the heartbreak and even offered to help you, and this is not on me girl, it’s all you and that crazy boss of yours that can’t keep his dick in his pants if he isn’t ready for commitment,”

He replied sarcastically and she laughed, his facial expressions didn’t help either.

“I should really give him a piece of my mind, no one messes with my girl,”

He added.

“Nah, he told me, it’s all my fault for falling for him, he never lead me on which is why I can’t even hate him, I knew what he had to offer and still went ahead, I guess I didn’t think it will be this painful that I will have to quit, and I ended things too, he wanted us to continue,”

“That son of a b***”

“Don’t finish that sentence Jord,”

She let out, cutting him off.

“You are still protective of him, why?”

“I am not, anyway enough of Lucas and my heartbreak story, the calls started coming again and even the texts and this time I am super scared, I don’t even feel like going back to my house, I feel like someone is watching me,”

She disclosed, aside from her current situation, she have been getting constant calls and texts and the weirdest of all being that whoever it was knew about her affair with Lucas and have been texting a lot, saying she should forget Lucas and that he was all she needed, she knew it’s a he because he actually talked the first day the calls started coming in, she had tried to picture who it could be but no one she knew had come to mind.

“Honey, you can stay here, shouldn’t you report to the police, at this rate even I am getting a weird feeling about this whole thing,”

Jordan said.

“Yeah, I thought of that but I don’t have any evidence,”

“Those lots of expensive gifts and the texts are enough evidence,”

“I don’t think those will do a thing Jordan, I am just gonna be careful and hope it’s just a harmless secret admirer,”

“I hope so too, but I am starting to doubt it because no sane person will slash that much money and still remain unknown,”

“My life, nothing is going my way, how did I get to this point?”

She asked laying back down as tears welled up in her eyes, on one hand, us a man she loved and wanted with all her heart who wants nothing to do with her, and on the other hand is a possible stalker who clearly has a thing for her and wants her for himself, his messages were very clear and the kind of gifts he sents too, she just wanted to sleep and wake and these whole things have gone away, Lucas and her back to the way they were before their affair, not like she regrets what happened between them but she wished they could just go back to the beginning when her feelings were still just hers, it was much easier.

*It’s gonna be fine,”

“I hope so,”

She replied, they talked for longer, he ordered dinner which they both shared, they watched movie and slept late, she made up her mind to hand in her letter of resignation the next day, so as Jordan slept, she brought out her laptop and sadly typed her resignation letter…